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Welcome to the world of PlonkerBridge

Muwell 2019 May 2018
Our second tied contest. Dave and Paul trailed by a bit through most of the Congress but came back in time.

Champagne:
  • Dave drinking so much wine one evening that he bid a number of optimistic 3NT contracts and apologised to his partner many, many, many times,
  • Paul for inadvertently lending the King of Hearts to the Diamond suit for the duration of the bidding
  • Neil reckons it's the first time Kev ever was the source of a slam misbidding episode

Scores here.


Scores here.

Haarlem 2018 Nov 2018
66 to Dave and Neil. Can't remember anything about this.
Scores here.

Clapham 2018 May 2018
18 to Paul and Neil. A hard fought contest, at one time they were fifty clear but clinging on by the end. Innovations included cocktail hour (Paul's Pisco Sours and Dave's Negronis) and for the first time in ages, a woman's voice was heard commentating on the play (admittedly Google Home's, but it's a start).
Scores here.

Formby 2017 Oct 2017
51 to Dave and Paul. Failed to write this until six months later, so no further comment.
Scores here.

Muwell 2017 Apr 2017
Demolition. 136 points is easily the most one-sided Congress ever. In thirty two playings. And equalling the record number of rubbers to boot. Sorry to Kev and Paul, who remained remarkably calm throughout.

Champagne:
  • Neil, for "can I help with that" followed almost immediately by a pack of cards scattered to the four winds.

Scores here.

Haarlem 2016 Sept 2016
Dave and Kev by eighty-three, catapulting them both up the all-time leader board (Dave into first and Kev into third!) So much for unassailable Neil.

Champagne:
  • None: forgot to write this up :-(

Scores here.

Clapham 2016 Jan 2016
Dave and Paul by 105. Wow.

Champagne:
  • None: forgot to write this up :-(

Scores here.

Formby 2015 Jan 2015
Dave and Neil by 124. This really, really does start to look like a two-horse race.

Champagne:
  • None: forgot to write this up :-(

Scores here.

Muwell 2014 Aug 2014
The second closest Congress ever: Dave and Kev by three.

Champagne:
  • None: forgot to write this up :-(

Scores here.

Haarlem 2014 10th Jan 2014
Kev and Neil by 62. Kev catches up with Dave (exactly) and Neil looks to be unassailable for all time. Our first ever 7NT (only 5NT remains unessayed).

Champagne:
  • The ancient record for a single rubber got beat with D and P racking up a cool 3,000 in two slam hands, not bad for a fifteen minute rubber. Rest of the Congress not so great though...

Scores here.

Clapham 2013 26th Jan 2013
Kev and Paul win by 43. Dave drops into the negative, leaving Neil only in positive numbers. Something must be done.
Scores here.

Champagne for:
  • Kevin really, just for turning up with a very very unhelpful bladder.


Formby 2011 4th Sept 2011
Neil and Paul by 84. Kev consigned to fourth in the all time, Neil with an unassailable alltime lead.
Scores here.

Champagne for:
  • No idea really, must update this sooner after the event in future.


Muwell 2011 4th July 2011
Neil and Kev cruise to victory. Slams all over the place. Two curries. Innovational bullshit button in use.

Scores here.

Champagne for:
  • Paul asking whose deal it was BEFORE the first hand hand been dealt but AFTER Neil had donned the chapeau jaune
    • Kev (playing the Q): ...and with one card, I demonstrate the gulf between the expert and average player...
    • Neil: why not just lead to the J?
    • Kev (after thought): er, yes, I suppose that would work as well


Geneva 2010 21st August 2010
A drawn Congress! Strictly, a narrow victory for Paul and Kev, but a magnaminous declaration of a draw after fifty rubbers found them just one point ahead. Not of course our first draw (Paul and Neil in Amsterdam '04) but still.

Scores here.

A photo from the alfresco session.

Champagne for:
  • Kevin making two insufficient bids in one session
  • Paul (correctly) accusing Neil of making a false claim, and then, having seen Neil's cards, misdefending badly enough to make the claim good.
  • Paul lebensohl aftre Kev ovcalled weak 2 with 2nt - resuced by opponents failure to double
  • two 5 spades contracts in a row
  • Paul's finest hour in many fine hours of explaining conventions: "it's just a double"
  • neil passing a xto of 1S and defending aggainst the 1nt he thought his partner had doubled
  • kevin believing he was one off in the above with five tricks


Amsterdam 2008, Muwell 2008, Formby 2009, Clapham 2009 Feb 2010
Gosh, forgot to update for four Congresses. Must do better. Still going strong though... Neil made it to first place, although Dave got it back at Clapham. It's a two horse race...

Clapham 2007 29th Oct, 2007
Victory for Paul. A short but eventful Congress. Innovation of cocktail hour warmly received.

No detailed scores, following an IT disaster. Still, at least we have the overall numbers.

Champagne for:
  • a massive sequence of breakages, including 3 glasses, a teapot, a sugar bowl, part of the coffee machine. What chaos
  • Dave attempting to play the "pass" and "2H" in the same flowing motion
  • Dave drinking far too much. Must learn to pace myself
  • Kev finding the "ruff and discard is the right defence" hand at the table


Formby 2007 10th Jun, 2007
Victory for Neil. Masterful, lots of minor coups but a rather large number of missed slams. Dave slumped to his first fourth place, but did it thoroughly.

Scores here.

Champagne for:
  • 1C-1H-4C* (".. a splinter in support of Hearts..." (copyright PF)
  • Dave atttempting to bid with a card from the other pack
  • A grand slam bid and made by Neil and Kev
  • A vast collection of Lionel-inspired jiggery-pokery, including our third redoubled contract since detailed records began (2C by Neil). Like the other two redoubled contracts, this one made with an overtrick.

Here's a picture of the happy team.
Muwell 2006 12th Nov, 2006
Victory for Dave. Closest Congress ever, I think: at no stage was there ever more than 100 points between first and fourth.

Scores here.

Champagne for:
  • Seemed like an unusually high standard of play, end-plays on purpose and all sorts
  • Neil's still not smoking
  • Errr... that's it (did nothing else really happen?)


Amsterdam 2006 30th April, 2006
Victory for Felters. We played 7D for the first time ever, it made, just 5NT and 7NT to go. What's more, we played our 500th rubber. Wow.

Scores here.

Champagne for:
  • The chapeau orange innovation
  • Paul lasting two and a a half days before asking who dealt whilst wearing said chapeau
  • Paul casually tossing a card through the crack between panels of the table
  • A grand slam to surprise declarer who *might* have been missing 3 aces
  • Neil asking Felters for suit preference at the 6-level
  • Other repeated errors including leading (P) and bidding (K) out of turn, forgetting Lebensohl (N), bidding freely to game when a part score would suffice (All), no cigarettes and no "red or black" (slipped up there)


Clapham 2005 24 December, 2005
The Evans run ended. Home advantage told, no records broken, no redoubled contracts, two 1100s but basically, very few fireworks. Are we perhaps becoming a little cautious in our old age? Only one new contract this time (1D doubled) but at least it made.

The gory details are here.

Champagne for:
  • Neil plays in a zero-one fit, following a CRO-Panama sequence in which that evil Felton passed him out. Oppos led a trump at trick one, dummy followed with a singleton, and declarer showed out... Still, -600 is OK, they have game, and the alternative sacrifice (5D doubled down 3) costs more. So chalk one up for a great system, that's what I say...


Formby 2005 31 July, 2005
Neil won for the third consecutive Congress, this time by quite some margin, and led from pillar to post. Rarely has the field been quite so thoroughly eclipsed. In the minor placings, Felters overcame some early setbacks to finish a comfortable second, and Dave's poor performance was only worsed by Kev's startling effort.

Some new all-time records appear on the scores page.

Champagne for:
  • Dave *nearly* following suit with a card to Kev's bid of 1 club
  • Dave goes six off in 3 clubs when Neil forgets they're playing Ghestem...
  • ... and Kev goes six off in three hearts just for the hell of it
  • a comfortable all-time record of thirteen slams bid, and even eleven made
  • two visions clouding Dave's sleep, one involving Kev and his wife's undies, the other Neil and hot metal


Muwell 2005 27 March, 2005
Neil wrapped up his first ever solo Congress victory with a lightning round of three finishing rubbers capped by the critical game, sealed on the very last hand. Meanwhile Kevin had led for most of the latter stages, finished in second but with the consolation of overall victory in the third four-Congress series. Dave and Paul managed an undistinguished scrap for a distant third.

As always, the details are on the scores page. This congress set new records for the best and worst individual scores and for the best ever pair score.

Champagne for:
  • Dave revoking on the lead of a trump. OK, just a revoke, but he did hold singleton ace....
  • Dave and Kev bid 7 clubs on a misunderstanding, then get a 5-0 trump break, then scrape home. I ask you...
  • Paul pulls off a trump coup, and what's more, knew he had before he did it!
  • Kev finds a perfect underlead ace and uppercut defence, but sadly partner holds the wrong cards
  • Partial elimination and endplay by Dave... sadly this time oppo hold the wrong cards
  • The next table at the curry house are caught discussing 5-card Stayman
  • Neil, hurrying to play enough rubbers to win, leaves his partner in 2D. Kev consequently becomes the first Congressite ever to make 5 overtricks....


Amsterdam 2004 22nd November, 2004
The early and total eclipse of Kev and Dave by the Paul and Neil partnership ensured a Congress that was a two horse race throughout. After a lengthy tussle, Congress history was set with our first ever tie for the laurels!

As always, the details are on the scores page.

Champagne for:
  • Neil attempting to bid with the playing card on the top of the nearest pack rather than a silent bidder. Not of itself that exciting, but as he turned it Kev remarked "be careful, you might bid 7 spades or something"... and guess which card appeared! What are the chances of that?
  • Kve and Paul bid and made 7S (still lost the set, though, snigger...)
  • Neil's dog-running injury (not that champanic really, but memorable). This also spawned our first photos for a long while. Perhaps we've lost a little sense of occasion...


Clapham 2004 1st June, 2004
After an early spurt from Paul (oo-er) Dave runs away with the laurels. Neil recorded one of the longer declines in Congress history, and sat in the doldrums for the latter parts. A remarkably consistent run of poor card holding...

More details on the scores page.

Champagne for:
  • Dave leading during the auction
  • The long-awaited first appearance of Kev's dressing gown
  • Our first outing to a concert
  • ...is that it?


Anglesey 2003 20th December, 2003
First of the third series! Another Congress running down to the wire, with Kev building an unassailable lead early, only to be assailed by first Neil and later Paul. Paul briefly took the lead after perhaps the most spectacular winning streak in Congress history, managing +99 in five 2-rubber sets, before a late burst from Kev garnered the laurels. More details on the scores page.

Champagne for:
  • A grandslam from Kev 'n Dave
  • The congress cake
  • Our first outing to a concert
  • The themed gala dinner
  • Our first take-away curry
  • Kevin's dressing gown (which sadly we never got to see)
  • Experimental bridge with leading from the wrong hand
  • Dave's face when Neil's dummy hand appeared in the 4D doubled vulnerable contract
  • The odd occasion where we used the word "Piss"
Less bridge champagne moments than usual - this may be due to reduced drinking, something to work on next time. Also, no photos yet - Kevmate, please could you send me the photo around the cake?


Muwell 2003 11th August, 2003
The second series of congresses completed in Muwell. with one of the closest ever congresses, the unassailable Neil leading throughout only to be assailed in the penultimate rubber by Kev. Still, Neil's close shave did move him into second place in the all-time stakes, as well as a share in the new all-time most successful partnership. But I'm not sure that's sufficient consolation...

Eventually photos will appear here.

Champagne for:
  • Dave completing the opponent's transfer
  • Tournament T-shirts
  • Paul raising his partner's 1H opener to 1H
  • Splendiferous lunch spreads
  • Playing the final day in what turned out to be the hottest heat on British record, just over 100 of your British degrees Fahrenheit
  • A large number of inane James Bond references

Amsterdam 2003 30th April, 2003
The second Amsterdam congress happened. Scores are here, including SIM scores and Neil's interesting spreadsheet.

Champagne for:
  • Our first Powerpoint presentation
  • Wooden prizes all round
  • Neil's emergence as statto
  • Kevin and the flimsy cards
  • Neil nets 7,930 points in five short rubbers
  • Dave plays a contract that makes itself

Clapham 2002 11th November, 2002
The second Clapham congress was the second of the second group. Scores are here, including the exciting new session by session graph display.

Champagne for:
  • Winding up Jimmy
  • The most destructive Congress yet with three broken glasses
  • Kev and the great wine spillage
  • a grand slam
  • SIM Bridge
  • (Jan's nomination) the fifteen (count them) empty wine bottles
  • golden syrup pudding

Anglesey 2002 4th May, 2002
The second Anglesey congress was the first of the second era. Sadly scores were business as usual. Also on the scores page is a downloadable spreadsheet of data that Neil "Statboy" Evans asked for - looking forward to his anal-ysis.

Another new item in this Congress was the "podium photo". Also check out the 3am crew - are we having fun yet?.

No champagne moments unless someone nominates one.
Muwell Hill Congress completed 1st January, 2002
The Muwell Hill Congress was the closest yet, with the final result in doubt until the very last hand.

Exciting innovations at this Congress included kippers for breakfast, le chapeau jaune for the tournament leader, the longest tournament yet at 27 rubbers and lots of detailed stats. More on the last soon: but for now, be aware that 195 hands were played in 27 rubbers.

Photos here.

Various further details and links may appear here if anyone write some copy. However, there were these jollities
  • Kev bids on to go down 2 in five diamonds after not sitting in 3D doubled because he "didn't want to be talked out of game"
  • Dave became the only four figure loser after finding a great psyche that required him to lose 1,100
  • Kev finds an imaginative J from Jx, partner Paul equally imaginatively unblocks from Qxx, leaving an unimaginative declarer with extra tricks
  • Dave calls Paul names after he fails to overtake J from AJTx with his K: but the main hurt is personal, as Paul misses his first interior sequence for many days and nights.

Amsterdam Congress completed 10th September, 2001
The Amsterdam Congress saw an exciting tournament, and the first Congress ever won without the benefit of home advantage. Previously struggling Paul Felton eventually won by 32 points, leaping from fourth in the overall standing to joint 3rd. Anglesey winner Horsburgh never had a look in, his card-holding skills showing severe limitatons as he picked up a lengthy sequence of dodgy hands.

Champagne moments included these:
  • Cleal opens 1C on a 5 card suit, 3 points, 3rd in hand, and saves game much to the chagrin of oppo, who make game on the next hand instead.
  • A vast number of 1-level contracts are undertaken.
  • Felton and Evans win a giant 27 point set of two rubbers, finishing the second with a vulnerable small slam.
  • Cleal hears voices opening 1C on a regular basis, particularly in the small hours.
  • No-one goes for 1,100 at any point
  • Felton and Cleal bid a completely unconvincing 7 of something or other that makes.
  • Cleal (for some inexplicable reason) leads KC into dummy's tenace, securing a previously impossible 3NT for Felton/Evans.

Photos of this glorious event are here.
STOP PRESS! Important announcement 30th August, 2001
Just hours after the launch of this web site, we've received our first extra contribution: a monumental effort from Neil. As befits a project manager of his stature, he's given us not only the planned agenda for the Amsterdam Congress, but also an accompanying risk assessment of just how bad it might get if we're really lucky.